


No Grave Can Hold My Body Down

by Silly_bullshit_collector



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends: Force Unleashed - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Armitage Hux Backstory, Basically Pride and Prejudice, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Smut, F/M, Finn and Poe love each other and no one can change my mind, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force Ghosts, Frenemies, Fusion of Star Wars Legends and Disney Canon, Gray Jedi, I don't remember much about biology, If you read this you will suffer, Kylo Ren Backstory, Kylo Ren Redemption, Love/Hate, M/M, Mad when they notice their feelings for each other, Mandalorian, Mandalorian Culture, Midichlorians - Freeform, Morally Ambiguous Character, Mutual Pining, Mutual Unrequieted Love, Partners Equal in Strength but one has Rabies, Power Couple, Rival Relationship, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, The Force Ships It, The Resistance is not so good, Virus, and The First Order not so bad, and with Space Wizards and galactic political conflict, but it's going to be worth it, but with at least one murder attempt or two, choosing a side is not easy, slothburn, so I will bullshit my way out of this, they are both idiots, they bicker like an old married couple
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-28
Updated: 2019-10-24
Packaged: 2020-01-15 20:00:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18506035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silly_bullshit_collector/pseuds/Silly_bullshit_collector
Summary: Segen has abandoned the dangerous habits of her old way of life. Now, she lives as a simple doctor in a hospital of Theed, capital city of Naboo. When most of the New Republic is destroyed with the explosion of Hosnian Prime, her regained peace seems disturbed by Kylo Ren and General Hux. They have arrived to the planet, to negotiate their surrender with the young Queen.After the fear starts to dissipate, revolts begin to emerge all across the galaxy. The New Republic has not been forgotten, and many will join the Resistance to put an end to the crushing tyranny of Snoke.Among the chaos Segen will have to do what is necessary to survive; and for this she can't keep denying who she truly is. The Force is guiding her to an uncertain destiny while the Master of the Knights of Ren hunts her mind and life, because of the force bond they share.As the First Order and the Resistance fight against each other, a new enemy is waiting for the perfect moment to attack. Meanwhile, a virus that can kill only force sensitive people, will arise. To stop the threat against their kind, Segen and Kylo, have no other option than to work together and put aside their differences.





	1. Shapeless

**Author's Note:**

> This story starts a little bit before the destruction of Starkiller Base, maybe a week or two. To make my story possible I have made little changes in the timelines so WARNING there will be canon variations (maybe I will add a few things from the EU and things from some video games). 
> 
> SECOND WARNING: BE READY FOR SLOW BURN, SLOW BUILD, AND SLOW ROMANCE. I know that is torture but I love it so prepare yourself because this love story is gonna take time, although it would be 100% worth it.
> 
> OFC (Segen) cast: Lea Seydoux (she has this mysterious and dangerous vibe that I love while still looking innocent)  
> (GIF) https://pin.it/ok3zf624zghoxm  
> OMC (Emmerik) cast: Keanu Reeves  
> OFC (Ah'ri) cast: Winona Ryder
> 
> IMPORTANT this is a bit of context if you have not played the game Star Wars The Force Unleashed (non-spoiler, I think): Galen Marek was a boy when Darth Vader found him and killed his father who was a Jedi. He took the boy as his secret apprentice and trained him with the hope of using him one day against Palpatine. Vader sent him to kill a few Jedis, that had survived the Order 66, to prove the boy worth and, plus, to make his dirty work. Rahm Kota was one of those Jedi. And Juno Eclipse was an Empire pilot in charge of taking Galen to his missions.
> 
> I have used the characters and stories of this game to make my fanfic. I have altered some of the facts in order to create my story (combined with the new movies) so is not going to follow the canon as I said before. There will be some major plot points but except for that this is canon variation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the first fanfic I write so I hope you can enjoy it. I will try to update regularly, all of you know that sometimes it is not that easy to write (especially if you get distracted by other ideas XD or just, you know, life in general). English is not my native language, but I try to improve, so you may find that as I discover these mistakes I'm gonna edit and change those things so it's more enjoyable for you guys.
> 
> *The picture at the end is not Tatooine despite the two suns

"Breath, focus on your surroundings," said a stoic voice "What can you feel?”

Segen closed her eyes again following her father's instructions. The Force was everywhere, encircling, emanating. She could distinguish waves of colors from all sorts of life, like a signature. Yellow for the birds chirping while flying. Pink from the butterflies perched on the flowers. Green from the growing seeds. Then she felt a pull. There was something she couldn't pinpoint, a color she has never felt before in The Force, almost shapeless, changing, black, white, black, white, red, black again. It was far away, but still strong and powerful.

_No, caution. Don't follow it._

The Force spoke to her, through feelings shaping into voices that guided her. She always listened, so she took a long breath and changed her focus on the waves of the shore, light grey almost white, the sea was calm today. Her mind expanded, seeing what her eyes could never see. She felt the energies around the nonliving things, her current house was close. Segen went to the kitchen where her mom was, then a burst of happiness coming from Ah'ri, she had felt her little girl.

That presence was still whispering in the back of her mind. So she was moving again, trying to go in a different direction, avoiding the pull as hard as she could. The city nearby, crossing the river, was so different from the countryside. The air was thicker and the sounds pulsating from The Force were messier. So many people, hundreds of buildings and ships.

Again, this time violently.

_No, return, don't go there. Stop._

She tried harder, but it was so intense.

_Caution._

Black, red, white, black, red, white, white, red. It was chaotic.

_Stop._

Then absolute quiet. No more chaos, and the shapeless color transformed into a confusing mass. Was it a person?

_No, be careful._

With each breath, the image was more solid although still not perfect. A man? No, a young boy, very tall. Dark hair, he was in a meditation position like her.

_Return, leave._

The voices were loud, but she couldn't help it, her curiosity was stronger than her. Segen got closer.

_Stop._

The Force surrounding him was strange, familiar but still strange. His eyes snapped, brown, sharp gaze.

"Who are you?"

 

_STOP._

 

"Segen!" She opened her eyes, Emmerik was holding her shoulders, kneeling in front of her.

"I... I..." she stuttered, covered in sweat and shivering.

"NEVER! Never do that again. Did you hear me?" Her father emotions were confusing, worry, fear, anger. Why? What was going on? What was that? "Answer me!" His hold on her tighter.

"Y... Yes"

"Always listen to The Force, you can't...." he stopped himself, aware now of her fear. He lowered his hands and his hold was lighter now. Sometimes he caught himself wishing that his little girl were normal, less powerful, so she could live happier, easier "I know is troublesome to you, but this is why we train each day, control over yourself is important. It will keep you safe"

"I'm sorry dad, I..." she said with trembling lips.

"No honey, it's okay. That's why mom and I are here" he hugged her. Pulling apart and standing he said, "Enough training, for now, let's go inside".

"But... Father" Segen wanted -no, needed- answers "What was that? Who was that boy?"

He halted and turned.

"You saw someone?" again so many emotions but his face not flinching even a little.

She nodded.

"Listen Segen not all force sensitive people are good some are dangerous and bad" his dark eyes softened.

"You mean those who use the dark side daddy?"

"Yes, sweetheart. What you were feeling while following this pull cannot be good. If you ever again are faced against it you must come to your mother or me, we will protect you. Do you understand?" his voice was though but she could feel his love through The Force. Emmerik wasn't an expressive person but in his own way, he showed his feelings.

"Yes dad," she said.

"Good, now let's go to eat. Mom must be waiting, we don't want her to get angry with us for been outside too long" he extends his hand to her. She grabbed it and he picked her up.

The two suns were hard today, Segen wished for a force power to no longer fill the heat. Did the Jedi had already invented that? Maybe she could do it once she became one. She preferred the white landscape of Csilla, snow was cooler and she could play a lot with it.

"Dad for how long are we going to stay in here? I miss home, my friends and it's so hot in this planet" she asked.

He chuckled, Segen hated this weather, and her pouting face was so sweet.

"I hate it too. Just two more months, your mom and I are working on something. Be patient for us, my little star".

"Yes dad" she answered lowering her face, a bit disappointed.

That was the first time Segen felted this unnamed boy, and it would be the first time out of three that she would hear his voice. She was only six, and for a few more years she would find him many other times. In visions, in dreams or during meditation, but usually she kept it secret from her parents only speaking when things were too much for her. Also sometimes she would see a dark figure near him, those days she would have horrible nightmares but she never said something about it. As if that would keep him away from her. It was terrifying. The boy was always there, close but unclear. Until one day he was no longer, only silence, after sensing so much pain and agony the boy's presence vanished.


	2. Winds of fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the second chapter as I promised. Hope you enjoy it 😘. You have no idea what it's coming after this *evil laughter* I'm going to have so much fun writing the next few chapters.
> 
> References:  
> ***** = Segen Dream
> 
> * = Change of POV
> 
> *  
> *= Time has passed/change of scene
> 
> News: Before I start writing chapter 5, I'm gonna edit chapter 2. I had just reread it and there are a few things that I don't like so I'm gonna change them. It's not going to be that much but enough to change a bit the story and the characters so in a few days or when I publish the next chapter you should check it out ;)

Segen stared at the clouds and watched them form shapes unmindful of the grass pricking her skin. The sun rising from behind the mountains on the horizon, a bright orange reflected on the clouds as another day started. She had just finished training and was enjoying the dawn before going to work. “Cherish these small moments” she remembered her mother used to say. Segen let the force fill her mind with all sorts of energies. The sunlight crushing the night, a Pelikki* hunting the fishes on the river, the fallen leaves flowing with the wind, this was like air for her lungs because the crowded cities could never hold such pure intensity. In nature, death had a porpoise of no vile intentions for it was only the circle of life. The birds needed to eat and the dead leaves gave space to new ones. Life and Death, together as one. These were the moments where she would feel most alone, standing between two sides and never truly belonging to one. As her parents used to teach her, there were no sides only the force.

Her mother Ah'ri and her father Emmerik had been two trained force-sensitive Gray Jedi who had broken ties with the New Jedi Order. Her father was one of the first Padawan of the young Master Luke, in his care he grew as a powerful warrior. As he got older, Emmerik, was more in contact with his dark side, unafraid of it. As a result of this a gap beyond repair opened between master and student, he tried to make him understand that feelings weren't something to fear or suppress and that, with proper control, passion could be used as mean to do good rather than destroy. His attempts of reasoning with Luke were futile, so soon he left to forge his path and even joined the Alliance as a pilot for the New Republic. Instead, her mother used to be a bounty hunter until, Segen's biological father, Galen Marek found her soon after he abandoned Darth Vader's side. Not only he guided her but offered her a place in the Alliance as well. He trained her applying all his knowledge in both the light and the dark believing was the best for Ah'ri since she had so much darkness within her. Acceptance of one true self and not denial was the only way for her to not fall into complete darkness. Luke disapproved Galen's teachings methods so he never allowed Ah'ri to join the Order. When Emmerik encountered Ah'ri, another Gray Jedi like him at the Alliance, he was desperate to get to know her. Later both ended up falling in love without hesitation like if The Force had pulled them together. Months after Juno Eclipse had died in childbirth in Kashyyyk, a vision hunted Rahm Kota's dreams for days, Snoke was a danger for the child of the secret apprentice of Darth Vader. So he trusted the security of the baby to Emmerik and Ah'ri, before sacrificing his life so they could escape the planet to the unknown regions.

Segen stood from the ground, cleaning the dirt from her clothes. Before leaving she looked once more at the clouds _If only my life were like this all the time_ she thought. Tempting ideas crossed her mind of going to a nameless planet somewhere in the galaxy to forget who she was, the Jedi, her past, the resistance and everything that had caused her pain. Instead of indulging in her impulses she walked the half-hour of road between where she was and the city of Theed, capital of Naboo. It was a clearing deep inside a forest. The extensive foliage of trees and plants around the place made it a perfect spot to train without being noticed by curious eyes. A great risk she took every time she went there but the training helped her to keep her mind and body sharp. Even if she was living now a quiet life as a doctor, it was a necessity. With Snoke still alive, controlling most planets, she could never be sure when it would be necessary to fight. It could be anytime, in an hour, tomorrow or maybe in a decade.

At the city, she lived on an old and beautiful building of twelve stories, her apartment was on the sixth floor. A small but comfortable place, soft beige walls, a living room with a wooden table and two chairs, a blue velvet couch with plants at each side of it, a big window behind with white curtains and then to the left the kitchen and the hallway to the bathroom and her room. Segen didn't even bother to make some breakfast and went immediately to take a shower, she stunk like sweat and dirt. So she settled up the water as hot as she could get. Once finished Segen put on her white robe uniform, pulled her blonde hair in a loose bun, took a cup of the strongest coffee she had and left.

The Central Hospital of Theed was an immense complex of different buildings connected through closed bridges. As most of the city, the hospital had an elegant design with impressive walls of stone of light color. Every entrance, like guardians, had marble statues, of at least seven meters high and one at each side of it. Green tiles, with intricate print patterns, decorated the rooftop in an attempt to assimilate the architecture to the natural landscape of Naboo. It was the most important medical center, so it also had five platforms for emergency ships. Thousands of people received treatment inside those walls. Arriving at the access door of wing 3, where Segen worked, she saw her friend Midala, a petite girl with lustrous light brown hair, fighting with Emil the chief of nurses, a languished guy with a perpetual sneer on his face.

"How am I supposed to do my job if I keep having the same problems with the droids configuration every single time?" She argued, steam coming out of her hazel eyes.

"That's not my problem" he answered without even taking his eyes off his datapad.

"Of course it is! You are the one changing it!"

"I'm just following the hospital politics. If you are incapable of doing your job then maybe you should consider a career up to your deficient skills" He turned to keep fighting but when he saw Segen getting close to them, he left in a hurry.

"I swear one day I'm going to kill him" Midala whispered to herself, fuming.

"Good morning Mil, I see that the night shift has treated you well".

"Oh, good morning Sec. I didn't see you there" she turned and her face relaxed.

"I saw your murderous intentions from a mile away. Don't tell me you are already planning it? Because I'm in, you just have to tell me when."

"Ugh don't even get me started because someday I'm gonna take your offer. That jerk is doing it again.” she said grunting “He just wants to piss me off because I refused to go on a date with him. I can't believe he still holds a grudge, that was years ago"

"Who on this planet would want to go out with him?” she asked with a crinkling nose as both walked together to the elevator “You did good, Emil is a dick”

"Well, enough of that asshole, don't wanna keep ruining my day,” Mil said as she watched her datapad when the doors opened on the third floor “I'm gonna go to check my last patient so I can leave. I have a nice bottle of whiskey waiting for me so I can drink my problems away".

"Your wisdom enlightens me, Master Midala"

"Good for you are my teachings, my young apprentice," she said while grooming a non-existent beard. They laughed and a couple of nurses, that were passing by, looked at them like if they had escaped the psychiatric ward.

"Goodbye crazy woman, see you tomorrow"

"Hey! I'm perfectly normal… Most of the time" she countered before the elevator doors closed again.

Midala has been her friend since Segen started to work here two years ago. They had an immediate connection, which only grew more when after her first month Segen punched Emil in the face for being disrespectful with one of her patients. She wasn't prone to retaliate in physical violence but when she read Emil mind, his thoughts were so disgusting and the energy coming from him was close to something putrid, that she just snapped and crushed her fist right in his nose. Of course, later, Segen had to use the force to manipulate her boss so he wouldn't fire her but it had been an absolute prize to see Emil's dumbfounded expression. Midala loved to remember it, "a cherished memory" as she used to call it.

A bell ranged and the elevator opened on the eighth floor where her office was. Pristine white lights and walls welcomed Segen. She went to the reception to update her datapad list of today's cases.

"Hello Kali, how are you? Anything interesting for me?"

"Hello, Doctor Bhiron. Here are the updates on the patients" she said in a monotonous voice while clicking on her datapad "There have been a few conditions changes, so Doctor Jardmu has made reports for those cases. Also, I've sent you a chronogram, there are two new surgeries programmed".

"Thank you, Kali, have a nice day," she said before leaving. Segen had begun to read when the nurse called again.

"Doctor Bhiron?"

"Yes, Kali?"

"Patient JV-6784 has been transferred to wing 5B" Great one more problem. She hated that wing, people with terminal diseases ended up there. It made her feel uncomfortable due to The Force.

"Who authorized that?"

"Doctor Xima"

"Ok, thank you"

Segen went to her office to finish reading those reports before going to check on her cases. Seating on the small leather couch, in front of her desk, she took a long breath before picking up the datapad. The energies in a hospital could be intoxicating. She could feel everyone's pain. Their despair was this grayish dark green like something rotten. The anguish of the family around could be even worse. There was a few she could feel were happy, those have been cured, but that wasn't the usual.

Sometimes she questioned why she had chosen this job, it may have been the voices guiding her but, still, she could have refused. Although somehow The Force always ended up getting whatever wanted, one way or another, so Segen just learned how to deal with this huge amount of negative emotions. There was a purpose behind this, even if she couldn't grasp it yet. Trusting on this kind of things wasn't an easy task for her and more than once felt uncomfortable being handled like a puppet. That didn't mean she didn't enjoy her job. It was exhausting, too many work hours, zero to none sleep time, and nevertheless, she helped those in need. Also, it was a great opportunity to use force healing, one of her specialties, without the danger of being exposed. Subtlety was necessary to not be discovered. To imitate a natural healing process she would perform this ability in small doses or otherwise, the droids could register any drastic change, dragging unwanted attention.

Like any other day, she began checking on those of critical condition first and going down the list to the healthiest ones. Throughout the day a strange piercing pain never left the back of her mind. Segen didn't bother to address it believing it must have been because of the people's energies like usual. It wasn't until she got out of an amputation surgery, later that day, that she lost balance and her vision was blurry.

"Wow, I got you," a worried male voice said while putting an arm around her shoulders "Are you alright Segen?"

Segen looked up, it was Elyon Xima.

"Thanks, Elyon" she answered steadying herself "I guess I'm just too tired"

"Hell yeah, that kinda happens when you work eighteen hours a day. Maybe a distraction would suit you well" Elyon said with his arm still on her "We are going to drink after this shift with the staff of sector G, you wanna tag along?" he asked hopefully, looking at her with those big green eyes. Xima was attractive, tall, dark skin that seemed to glow like freaking gold under the sunlight, dark brown hair and that devilish smile. He could make any girl's knees weak.

"Sorry, not tonight, I need a good night sleep" she denied shaking her head and taking a step away from him. Alcohol would only make it worse for her.

"I can help with that too" he smirked.

"Oh I'm quite sure of that" Segen said arching an eyebrow "but this time I mean actual sleep and we both know you're impossible for that task"

"You are breaking my heart"

"Still not going, even if you try to manipulate me with those pretty eyes"

"So you think my eyes are pretty" he claimed as he inched closer with a smug smile.

"Goodbye, Doctor Xima," she said ignoring him and turning to leave before he could see her slight blush. _I hate that smile, it's not fair_ she thought.

Elyon and Segen had a thing, they flirted almost every day, they enjoyed to compete against each other to see who could get the most horrible case of the week (the loser had to pay the drinks) and they had even been together a few times. But she didn't want any kind of commitment. Not fully knowing for how long she could stay at Naboo or if someday she would have to run for her life, terrified her. Dragging him to this type of life it would be like cursing him, and Elyon was too good for that. So they stayed like that for a while, like an occasional booty call with some sorts of friendship in between. Incapable of resisting her curiosity she had probed into his mind a few times, he wanted more, he wanted a life with her, going to dates and for her to meet his parents. Elyon desired a true relationship with her, so that's why she had ended whatever they had before it was too late. Midala almost chopped her head off once she heard the news, saying that she wouldn't find someone like him again and she would die alone with twenty-five cats and a protocol droid if she couldn't apologize with Xima that same night. Segen believed that giving him a chance to move on and getting to know someone new was the best she could do for him. But gods, that man was stubborn, he never stopped flirting, asking her out and whispering sweet or dirty things in her ears when no one was watching. He was determined to win her back. There were a couple of times when she almost gave up and that's when the idea of working so many hours had kicked in. That way she wouldn't think about her life or, how in moments of loneliness, she wanted to be in Elyon's arms pretending to be a normal girl, imagining a future she couldn't have.

As she crossed sector G she watched the clock on her datapad, it marked 00:13, if it weren't because she used the force to sustain herself she probably would have had an aneurysm by now due to the stress. Working until exhaustion was not the ideal way of handling her problems but her brain or the voices didn't offer better choices, so she stuck to that for now.

At her office, she grabbed her things and left the hospital as quickly as possible.

Every step, she took away from that place, gave her a sensation of breathing fresh air again. The pressure on her head never stopped though, even when she was far from the building. She came to a halt when she realized what it was. _Fuck_ she cursed to herself, she had been wrong this whole time. _How can I be so stupid?!_ It wasn't the hospital's energy or lack of sleep, it was something else. Familiar with the meaning of the pain Segen walked faster, almost jogging. _Please not here, not in public!_ Imploring to the skies like if the Force could hear her. Even at midnight people was out on the safe streets of Theed and someone could see her. So close, only two blocks more. _Common, I can make it!_ now running she opened the door of her building with her mind and climbed the stairs. Panting she slammed the door of her apartment. Her vision was blurry again, only this time her surroundings were becoming dark. She didn't move from the spot she was in, her furniture was moving, she couldn't place if her mind was spinning around or if she was doing that. The voices were so loud that understanding what they were saying was impossible, grunting she pressed her palms on her temples to ease the pain. Feeling as if every cell on her body was screaming and twisting. Darkness enveloped her and she collapsed on her living room.

*****

Segen woke up on a cold soft ground, snowflakes hitting her face. Despite the heavy snowstorm, Segen was warm and not even her breath was visible.

 _Walk_.

She stood using a tree nearby as support. Long pine trees surrounding her and no matter where she looked, her view was always meet with a dense forest. Confused she thought for a moment that it could be Csilla, the cold planet where she grew up, but then remembered that their forests had a different fauna. Still dizzy, Segen forced herself to move because there was a reason The Force was showing her this, the least she could do was try to understand why. It was getting darker way to fast so she quickened her walk until she reached a clear and watched the sky in horror. The Sun was being consumed, dying as if something was absorbing it from this same planet. Her heart beating nonstop, her palms sweaty and her knees shaking. Segen contemplated the death of a star and an overwhelming feeling of dread paralyzed her. Segen needed to escape, to run anywhere, she didn't want to keep seeing this but her legs didn't respond to her anymore. Then a huge red light, close enough to her, was shotted into space. A blinding heatwave expanded burning down the forest with winds of fire, she saw it getting closer. On instinct, she moved her arms up to her face in a vain attempt to protect herself but the wave never touched her.

_Safe._

When Segen opened her eyes she was no longer in the forest but in a crowded city. Standing in the middle of a square next to buildings higher than the clouds, unable to recognize the place. Shaking from before she moved slowly, the dreadful feeling never abandoned her heart. The peace didn't last long because the night sky turned red, the same horrible light from before. Some people screamed others were hugging each other and some tried to run with a false sense of hope, of escape. She stayed there observing how in their hearts they knew this was their end, tears in her eyes, shocked by this image of imminent destruction.

*****

Segen startled, drenched in sweat and breathing raggedly, her vision returning bit by bit. Once she could see again, she was back on her living room and it was daylight. Her muscles were numb from sleeping on the floor. It had been so long from the last time she had a vision so vivid.

Crouching up to her couch she stayed there analyzing what she had just witnessed. Was that a Death Star? Was it new or old? Maybe it was Alderaan she thought hoping it wasn't true, it couldn't be. Her mind racing a mile per minute. _Why did I just saw that?_ _F_ _uck, al_ _l those people, so much death_ she thought as she remembered what she had seen.

Her holopad on the table ringed and it made her migraine stronger. The sound piercing her head, she didn't want to answer but it was Midala. Without getting up she pressed the holopad.

"Hi, Mil ho..." the screaming image of Midala interrupted her.

"Where the fuck have you been? Do you know how worried I was? You have never been late for work before and Xima told me that yesterday you almost passed out after surgery. Are you alright? Is everything okay?" Mil barked.

"Wow, wow, calm down Mil, I barely understood a word of what you just said" she was talking so fast and her voice was two notes higher than normal

"Calm down? Calm Down?! With all that is going on?! Are you crazy?! I'm a ball of nerves right now and I just drank two sleeping pills!"

"What do you mean with 'what is going on'?" Now Segen was freaking out, why she was so worried? _Please don't let it be my vision, please not my vision_ she prayed.

"You don't know? Have you been sleeping all day?" she asked with a tone of disbelief.

"Who cares Mil! Can you please just answer me?"

She saw Midala taking a long breath, confusion written all over her face. And was that... fear?

"The First Order attacked the Hosnian System"

A tensed silence filled the room.

"What?... W... What do you mean with an attack? Were they invaded?" This was worst, so, so much worse than she thought. It couldn't be.

 _True_.

The voices told her that indeed Midala was being honest.

"I mean that Hosnian Prime and the rest of the planets were destroyed like in the times of the Empire. The New Republic no longer exists Sec, we are alone now in this war".

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Pelikki: Is a type of bird native from Naboo that looks like a Pelican.
> 
> I hope you had enjoyed this chapter, I'm already writing the third one so I think I'm gonna be able to upload next Friday. See you then 😘 and thanks for reading.


	3. Whispers of Fate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is again 😊 enjoy it. 
> 
> *PD: There's a little surprise at the end 😉

The New Republic no longer exists, a sentence that plagued the hearts and minds of the galaxy. What it used to be a source of courage to fight against an unstoppable enemy, was now no more than mere dust that fueled their terrible ambitions. The once roaring streets of Theed were met with silence and a special kind of sadness for there were still those who remembered the dark days of the Empire. On misty alleys, whispers of hope could still be heard and a few believed in them, stubborn at the idea of submission, but most were lost. Who can defeat the First Order now? They asked. No one was their answer.

That morning Segen trained harder than she ever did before. Her movements filled with anger, frustration and confusion. _Should I leave Naboo? Should I stay? What was the point of escaping now if the promise of a safe place had shattered? A planet on the Outer Rim or the Unknown Regions could give me protection for a while but for how long until they came again?_ She was so tired of running, of abandoning friends to never see them again, of feeling so unsafe and alone.

Brooding over these feelings would lead her to nowhere, so she meditated. Making decisions based on harsh emotions was not a wise idea. Seating on the grass for two hours with crossed legs and closed eyes, Segen let herself be carried away by currents of energy circling her. Bolts of something similar to electricity rushed down her body forcing her senses to widen beyond her limitations. Seducing her mind to open and allowing the Force to take control. At first, it was wild, almost untamed, and then shifted to peaceful flows. Tuning on the sounds the currents made, she listened. The voices getting clearer, emotions changing into words.

_Wait, you will know when to move._

_That was... Not helpful at all_ Segen thought. It did give her an idea of what to do for the next days but it was so inconclusive. She sighed, running her hands along with her wavy hair. For now, she would have to settle with that answer and try to work with what she had. 

Take a step aside, make a plan, be ready and most importantly adapt or die. Those were the words that had guided her through all her life. Her father had been quite persistent with them, and until now had been successful in guaranteeing her survival.

Deciding it was enough, she returned to her apartment planning on taking a very long hot shower. Today she was in no hurry, if she needed to be alert she couldn't be tired, so Segen had reduced her working hours to normal. Once there she stripped her dirty clothes and went to the shower. She took her time washing her hair, scrubbing her skin while massaging her sore muscles, relaxing instantly. When she got out she dressed in a simple black shirt and comfy grey pants and prepared breakfast. She was checking her datapad while eating when the screen changed without her doing and a green light displayed an incoming emergency transmission. That was a special channel that only the Queen could activate, connecting every personal datapad and holopad of the entire planet. A video, with the young Queen, started to reproduce:

_Dear people of Naboo_

_I'm afraid today I must be the bearer of terrible news and confirm the doubts that had settled in my people's minds. As you might already know, the New Republic is down. Last night, Hosnian Prime was attacked in the most dreadful way as nothing more than rocks and ashes are left. Our hearts will always carry the memories of our friends and brave fighters of freedom._

_It was destroyed by a new weapon of terror, created by The First Order, known as Starkiller Base. Due to the power of destruction and the threat it represents for all of us, my advisers and I have decided to surrender to preserve the lives of Naboo._

_Tomorrow, a convoy of The First Order will arrive with ambassadors so we can start our negotiations to discuss our terms and conditions of our surrender for the next two weeks._

_I advise to any remaining member of the Alliance to leave the planet and to not attack the convoy or you will be detained._

_I'm deeply sorry, my people, to speak these words to you but you have chosen me to protect you and that intention is still in my heart. This is, I believe, the safest choice we have at this precise moment so please I request for your understanding._

 

Segen froze, her hands trembling a bit. _The First Order was about to invade and the Force wanted for her to wait?!_ she thought. She stood up, pacing like a maniac around the room from the window to the door. An entire convoy of her enemies marching on Theed was a great threat.

Segen was sure that no one knew about her whereabouts, her cover was perfect so at least for the moment, she could rely on still being anonymous. She breathed in and took a seat again at the table. Calming down she draws a plan to maintain a low profile. Training would be impossible, staying indoors was safer. No more force healing too, the assistance of Kylo Ren and his Knights have not been confirmed and in the best case they wouldn't even show but she couldn't risk being detected by another force sensitive. Tomorrow she decided that she should go and check the escaping routes she had formulated when she first moved here, in case they needed to be updated. She had at least two or three ways to flight from her house, the hospital and the city.

Not wanting to waste more time, she prepared for work, dressing with the usual light grey uniform and the white robe down to her knees. Not in the mood for walking she took the transport at the station with a direct route to the hospital.

A message on her datapad appeared when she crossed the doors of wing 3. It was from her boss, Director Gedlik, calling to an urgent meeting at 10 am, on wing 1, to all personnel available. Suspecting what could it be, she didn't pay it too much attention and went directly to her office.

The two hours before the meeting passed quickly, so Segen finished checking on a patient and left to wing 1. It was the biggest building of the hospital located at the center of the complex. Since the best rooms were there, the rich people preferred to be treated on wing 1 and it also had the research labs were groundbreaking medical discoveries were being investigated every day. For these reasons, Naboo had the best doctors and treatments of their entire system. Aliens and humans traveled to their planet in hopes of finding a solution to their health.

Inside the conference room, the air was uncomfortable, stress could be sensed. Nurses and doctors shifted nervously on their seats. She didn't need to read their minds to know why they were feeling so bad. The morning broadcast video settled, among the people, like a punch in their stomachs. They questioned about their future, insecure of their well being. What if the negotiations went wrong? What would happen if the First Order decided to make a full invasion on Naboo? Their thoughts were so loud that Segen had to concentrate on repelling them.

She took the seat next to Livya, a nurse friend of her, the grey-haired women gave her a faint smile but her sad eyes didn't follow the expression. Her husband used to be a resistance fighter against the Empire, he had died on battle and this situation just brought her back awful memories.

"I'm pleased to see everyone here, you will have to tell to those who couldn't make it today, about what you are gonna hear today," Director Gedlik said standing up with his hands on his back.

He was a tall thin man, piercing dark eyes with a few wrinkles around and ash-blond hair.

"I suppose that all of you have seen the message our Queen has sent, so I'm gonna be brief. Today at dawn I had a meeting with Advisor Millue, she has expressed that it will be our duty to serve to The First Order and during their stay, you will no longer receive orders from me but instead from  General Hux. There is also a possibility that certain staff members might be selected to work on the Supremacy and the Finalizer, and that rejecting this offer could mean treason".

For a few seconds, no one knew how to take the news. Taken aback for this request they had lost words.

"You can't be talking seriously, right?" a nurse, the first to talk, said with wide eyes.

"Work for them? It's this some kind of joke?" someone else asked in disbelief.

"What if we get selected? I'm not gonna abandon my family, my children need me. I'm all they have. I can't leave them alone" a doctor said, shaking with tears in her eyes.

"This is insane! First, they threaten us with that disgusting weapon and now they ask for total submission?!" doctor Jardmu screamed enraged slamming his fist against the table.

The outraged yells spreading across the room, doctors and nurses expressing their worries. Soon the energy around was dark, fuelled by their fear and anger.

"Please everybody! Silence!" Gedlik demanded "I know that this is beyond horrible for all of us but please try to understand that if you refuse it means death penalty" he signed, his palms were against the table and he lowered his head in defeat.

The room went silent again.

"We must resist this if we want to keep living. We no longer have a choice in the destiny of our planet but we can help to keep the peace" he continued.

"Peace? This is not peace, this means a life of misery. It's not enough for them that we are about to lose our freedom so they are also asking us to sell ourselves to them!" Midala spoke for the first time, fire burning in her eyes. Several heads nodded in agreement."And we just simply must take it and say thanks for not killing us?"

"Yes, Doctor Midala, that's exactly what you must do. There is no other choice" he acknowledged. "Return to your work stations, the meeting has finished"

That day proceeded at a slow pace. A dark shadow hovering the hospital. The break lunch was quiet, a few mumblings could be heard but nothing could distract them from their devastated hearts.

Segen was able to catch up with Midala on her office, she didn't saw her at lunch.

"I can't believe this. We fought so hard and now all of that is lost. I've lost my father, my mother is traumatized and now I have to see their fucking faces marching proudly on the streets we grew up" Mil hissed clenching her fists so tight that the knuckles were white.

"I know, it's like it doesn't matter what we do they rise again. They take everything from us, again and again, but they never suffer the consequences" she said wrapping her arms around her, flashes of her past passed through her mind.

"I'm so tired of this war. I wish I could kill them all, I wish we could fight them".

"From now on, we gotta be careful with whom we talk about this stuff. Did you hear me Midala?" Segen turned on her chair inching closer and took Midala's hand on the desk with a serious look on her eyes "What you said in the conference room, as true as it was, can't happen again. They could mark you as a resistance member, you could die". Segen was so scared for her friend, she couldn't even think about losing her.

"Is that why you were silent?"

"Yes, I think a low profile would be better. Besides they have eyes and ears in every corner, we can trust no one".

"True," she said nodding "but I also think that keeping my mouth shut would be like betraying all my beliefs. Insulting the sacrifice of my father".

"Your father wouldn't want you dead and neither do I".

 

*

*

 

Segen left earlier that day, so she went with Midala to drink at the bar not far from the hospital. “Our last mindless night of fun, we gotta make it count” she had said while dragging Segen to their favorite place. At the moment it seemed like a good idea but now that she was stumbling on her stairs she had begun to regret it. She could already picture that hell of headache she was going to have in the morning.

She fought with the key lock for a moment, she couldn't find it but then realized that she didn't have a key lock and giggling tapped the code. Once in she went to her bedroom and took her clothes off throwing them all over the hallway. Almost launching herself to her bed she fell asleep the moment her head touched the pillow.

_You are walking down a path of no return._

_Be careful child, darkness could consume you._

_Light is everywhere you just have to look for it._

_Beware of destinies. They are rarely what you expect._

_There is no light without darkness._

_You cannot run from destiny, it will find you._

_You may close your eyes to the whispers of fate but they cannot be silenced._

Whispers echoing, unrecognizable voices, all of them speaking at the same time. Some she understood but others were lost among the commotion. Segen's body was wrapped in energy, her arms and legs felted as if she was floating in the air. The incessant voices fell silent when she opened her eyes and as if gravity had returned she was pulled back to the floor once more. It was all black around her, except for a small bright dot far away. The blackness consumed her in feelings of loneliness and terror. She gasped for air, coughing, her lungs barely getting oxygen. Crawling she moved as she could to the dot, the darkness slowly loosened the grip it had on her and her breathing returned.

To force-sensitive people dreams had a meaning, hidden behind strange fantasies and realities that without the help of the subconscious mind could never be brought to life. In the vulnerable state of sleep, the Force was able to take full control of one's mind. So with this idea present, Segen followed the light and with each step, the ground was becoming softer like if she was walking on mud.

Images of high crooked trees were becoming clearer. From within their core, glowing crystals of different colors could be seen in high contrast with the dark wood. Thick foliage preventing all light from the sky, and everything beyond half a meter was covered in a fog that clouded her sight so the only source of light were those crystals.

Confused as to where she should go, Segen moved from one place to another hoping she would catch a glimpse of a road. She groaned, slamming her hands against a tree, there was nothing more than mud and roots.

Until her eyes saw something that intrigued her. A particular crystal shining through with a strong blue light. She felt a pull so powerful to it that an odd sensation ran through her body, it was warm and tender. The whispers were back, and the closer she came to the crystal they intensified, but she was incapable of going in any other direction.

_No, caution._

A cracking noise behind her, she turned and there was nothing, just fog, and plants, so she didn't mind it. Her legs moving in their own accord, her eyes hypnotized by the crystal that now was glowing at the rhythm of a heartbeat.

_Return, careful._

Segen was right in front of it, the crystal almost at the tip of her fingers when she heard the noise again but louder. As she turned those shapeless colors that had hunted her since she was a child, were back again.

Black, white, black, red, red, white, black.

This time she saw a massive dark shadow in the distance, getting closer in menacing strides but the fog made it impossible for her to have a fair picture of him. Segen gasped taking several steps behind and then she froze. With her mouth open and widen eyes, Segen stared at the creature lurking between the trees like a predator.

"Who are you? How are you here?" From the shadow a deep mechanical voice came, demanding. When she tried to speak to him, her voice was caught in her throat and then she tried to run away but was unable to move, it was the Force that kept her locked there.

He raised his hand and she felt him probing in her mind but Segen blocked it in a second. Her mental walls were strong. _It's him again… but how?_ raising her eyebrows, her face whitening as her hand moved up to her mouth and the other gripped the tree next to her. _This is a shared dream!_ she realized. Segen needed to escape from this dream right now, scared of the consequences this could bring to her.

"How did...?" he asked but cut himself surprised with the ease she had pushed him out of her head. No one had the power to do that besides his master and him. _Could this mean it's her?_ he thought. He kept moving to her, intrigued, but the fog was so dense that a small figure was the only thing he could see. He tried to use a force push to remove the annoying obstacle, nothing happened, he grunted.

She ignored his presence for a moment closing her eyes focusing on waking up and shutting down all distractions, so she would only feel the power in her, to break the link.

"No! You won't get away from me!" he screamed as he felt her intentions. He ran to her but it was too late she was now gone, again.

Segen awakened covered in cold sweat, she ran her hands through her hair but they were shaking so she only made a mess. She remained seated in her bed for a few moments. Closing her eyes, trying to calm down her rapid breathing and clenching the blanket, until her knuckles were white, to stop the shaking. Her head was pounding, it was the hangover, she regretted drinking so much.

Healing herself she cured the headache using the Force. Segen stood up and went to the small window, she opened it so she could breath better, filling her lungs with fresh air. The soft breeze pulling out the locks of her face. _It was him, definitely, that... shapeless color it couldn't be someone else but him_ she thought as her mind replayed the images of her dream. The last time she felt him was eight years ago. _Wh... Why is back? Why after so long? Who was he? Why the Force insists on connecting them but they can't see each other?_ her brain desperate to get an answer, to understand.

Minutes passed as she stared at the city, leaning against the window frame, arms crossed. She watched the people while they began their daily routine. Although her mind wasn't paying much attention to it, she was lost in deep thought. Her, somewhat, regained a state of calmness collapsed when she finally looked up and saw a Star Destroyer in the sky between two of the three moons.

 

*

 

Kylo woke up and as he did some of his belongings crashed to the floor as they had been levitating while he dreamed. He felt his heart beating strongly against his ribcage. He stayed in his bed, covered by black silk sheets, for he was unable to process what he had just dreamed.

Closing his eyes, Kylo took a deep breath. Muscles aching as if he had being through harsh training. The amount of power he must have used to connect with someone across the galaxy had drained all of his energy.

Was that who he thought it could be? He shook his head. _No, impossible, it couldn't be, not after so long_. He ran his hands through his face and he sat on the edge of the bed staring at the floor with his mind lost in memories he thought would no longer return to torment him.

For a long time, that presence had visited him. While meditating and in dreams, he connected with whoever that person was. She had always been there, next to him but in a different way than Snoke. It has never felt like a threat, in fact, he was curious. Years of questions resurfaced has he remembered. He never knew how she looked like, who she was or even her name, he only saw glimpses. The connection grew stronger once he went to the Jedi Temple, he would see her often but still, she had always been a mere blur in the back of his mind. Even if he was dying with doubts he kept this to himself, not sure that Luke could offer him the answers. After he turned to the dark side the bond died, no more dreams, no more visions, nothing. Just a deafening quietness, that made him go insane. He hated it, that connection was the closest chance Kylo has ever had of getting to know someone like him. Light and darkness floated around her in equal parts. She was as dark as him and perhaps she could understand his struggle like Luke hadn't. Kylo had tried to communicate but he only succeeded three times and he never heard a single noise in return. Anger grew on him during these eight years, feeling disgusted for missing that connection.

And now, somehow, they had just shared a dream. _Why? Why the fuck would this happen again?_ It felt like some kind of joke. Now that Kylo was not even remotely interested, it had returned. He would be lying if he admitted that he had not tried to open once more the bridge that the Force had made. Although, that had been a long time ago when he had just started his training with Master Snoke. He had been weak, he was alone and filled with doubts about his Master teachings. As he had made with his parents, friends, and Luke, he cut ties with her too for she was only an obstacle to reach his full potential. 

Kylo stood up and almost fell to the floor as he walked, so he steadied himself with the metallic table of his living room. That dream must have been more exhausting than he had initially thought. Not bothered by this he kept moving and dressed in his usual black robes and mask. Planning to meditate later, maybe now that his powers were stronger than ever before, he could find why the Force is being so adamant in this link between them.

He turned, looking to the extensive window that occupied the space of an entire wall, showing the galaxy. The Finalizer was no longer in hyperspace and Naboo was in his view. 

He stormed out of his quarters to the elevator and pressed the button to the highest floor where he had audiences with his master, Supreme Leader Snoke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading 😘
> 
> And yes, there will be times where I'm going to write from Kylo's perspective. It will make it more interesting to see this story from more than just her angle. I hoped you had liked it. I'm already working on the next chapter so I think I might post it soon.


	4. Different Shades

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it took me a long time to write this chapter, there was a scene that drove me crazy. Sorry for the wait I hope is worth it.
> 
> *The image is just for reference. It is supposed to happen at night*

General Hux tapped with contained fury on his datapad. Waves of hate coming out from him since Snoke had given him the news that Kylo would be participating in the negotiations.

Ren sat still has he perceived Hux's worries towards their mission. It was not a secret that his temperament, more often than not, took the best of him. Although, his effectiveness against resistance operatives compensated his aggression and lack of control in certain situations.

Naboo had a strong presence that opposed the First Order's politics. Such dangers were far too great to let their mutual hate interfere, for there were many things at risk. 

Snoke was determined, to gain Naboo's support through diplomatic measures. To set it as an example to the rest of the Galaxy. Besides, it had countless natural resources they couldn't aloud to get destroyed by Starkiller Base. Snoke wasn't as foolish as Palpatine. Hosnian Prime was a necessity but this time, destruction could be avoided.

So his presence was more of a safety measure, to reassure their ambassadors, and prevent any possible threat from their enemies. Kylo had suggested one of his knights, but Snoke had insisted that he should be the one to go. It was strange to be in his grandmother's planet. The last time he had been here was with his mot… General Organa. 

But neither the importance of such task nor the risks were strong enough to pull Kylo's mind out of thinking about the dream he had last night. He could still feel her presence like a scar, printed deep down in his conscience. More than once the Force had taken him to that forest of crystals. He was a child sleeping on the Falcon, he remembered, the first time he was taken there by the force. Kylo had always been alone in the forest, the soothing crystal lights were his only company. And now, out of nowhere, she had appeared there too. 

The strangest thing for him was the reason behind this connection. His head went back and forth with the problem. In all his years of training, he had never heard of such a thing. All of this had a purpose, one which he couldn't understand. And like the fool he was, he had let that girl escape.

Kylo tightened his fists until his leather gloves crunched with the pressure. Sensing his commander rage, a captain, shifted uncomfortably in his seat for there was no place to escape as they were traveling on a diplomatic shuttle. 

If he were to find her there again, his strategy needed to be different. He couldn't aloud her to getaway. She seemed trained, he had been repelled quite fast. _Does she have a master? Luke was not an option, or Snoke would have felt it,_  he thought.

Too caught in his mind, he didn't notice that they had landed. The welcoming party, that was already waiting for them, did nothing to improve his mood. He just needed a few moments away from all of these people. Especially he needed to get as far as he could from Hux. Who, despite the irony, couldn't even bother to hold back his emotions.  

Only the Queen's envoys and advisers were present. The place had been cleared out of any other possible ship, to give space to the TIE fighters that escorted their shuttle.

Kylo walked down the ship next to the General with the rest of their convoy and stormtroopers behind them. As they moved to exchange the respective formalities, according to the protocol, Kylo sensed a disturbance in the Force. He tensed and looked at both sides to find the source of conflict. Armitage, already used to his odd behaviors, noticed a change in his stance but remained impassive.

"Is it something I need to worry about?" he muttered under his breath.

"Not for now," a deep mechanical voiced answered.

"You better fix it then, sooner rather than later. I don't want any interruption in my schedule."

Kylo wanted to keep his suspicions at bay until he could confirm what he had felt. Hux would warn Snoke without losing time if he knew that another force-sensitive person could be here.

He breathed in, as another flush of energy washed over him like bolts of electricity. It clouded his senses for the briefest of seconds. _Yes, that must be it, that girl must be on this planet,_ he concluded. Perhaps their proximity reactivated, whatever they had and it would certainly explain their shared vision.

He smirked, it had been so long since he has had a challenge like this. He wanted to witness what she was capable of doing. To see her power, her strength, if she had any.

 

*

 

Segen had not returned to sleep after that vision. Strange was, how one can lose awareness of time. Because, in some moments, it seemed to never be enough but in others, it was too slow. Long past dawn, the sun was up and the day had already started. But Segen had not moved an inch from where she had spent, who knew how many hours, sitting in her living room. Her hands extended on the table with her eyes glued on a stain of the wood. Shocked, she focused on everything and nothing at the same time. 

Twenty-five years she had spent her life escaping from the First Order. Training, planning, not forming too many attachments, and doing what it was necessary, all in hopes of never being captured by Snoke. None of that seemed to matter now that the Finalizer was in orbit, breathing in her neck. 

Segen was surrounded, trapped in her own home. Not even with her previous lifestyle had she been so close to them, not after her parents' death. A chill ran down her spine when she remembered the last time this had happened. She shouldn't have chosen to stay at Naboo. Perhaps a miserable town in the middle of nowhere could have been a better option. But, at the same time, if there was something she had learned is that those who chased you would expect that you escaped to less populated places. That's why she had gone to Theed, a thriving city, to hide among millions of people. To be another face in the crowd and just another number on a statistic whose existence didn't matter much.

When she had moved to this planet, Segen had considered her options. She could never deny the chance of war, unlike the New Republic. Believing that, sooner or later, The First Order would reveal their true intentions to the Galaxy. But this? Never. Waking up with the news of an entire system wiped out, was not a scenario that she had imagined. In her defense, Segen never thought that after two epic failures with the previous Death Stars, they would keep trying to make a third one.

As she was too caught up in her problems to care, she had not noticed that it was getting late to go to work. So when her datapad alarm rang, it took her by surprise. _Was it worth it to go to work now? Maybe I should leave this place today,_ she thought.

_No, you must stay here. Don't go._

The voices confused her. _Why would that be a good option for me?_ She reasoned with them _._ But they kept talking and telling her otherwise. An instinct that there was something important that she needed to do before leaving, invaded her mind. 

She walked to the window and hugging herself tightly, she stared once again at the ship in the sky. The Force had never failed her, more than once she couldn't understand it but, still, it had never led her to a dangerous path. And to be honest, perhaps staying was for the best. For how long was she going to keep running, abandoning her home again and again, for that creepy old bastard? A wave of power cracked the glass as her fist slammed against the wall. 

Realization hit her of what she had done, she darted and sat down on her couch. She breathed in, unclenching her jaw and shoulders. This was not the time to let her anger control her. Nor to use her abilities without logic.

 _This is not the first time you have faced them. Perhaps not against people from the High Command, but still. You know what to do when to move and how to act. You have experience and a handful of escape routes. And if those plans fail, the Force will show the way. You can do this Segen,_ she spoke to herself while rubbing her sweaty hands in her pants. 

Closing her eyes, she felt energy going through her bones. A prayer of help in her mind, _guide me and I will follow,_ she said. A bright warm sensation, enveloping her body. Her soul responded to the comfort of the Force. 

With new strengths, she went to her bedroom and dressed in her white uniform. But as she reached the door Segen stared at it, shaking slightly. 

_Time to be brave, child._

So in this state, she went to work. Divided between an overthinking mind and a trusting heart. With hope, if not in herself at least in the Force.

 

*

*

 

Stormtroopers were patrolling the main streets of Theed. The local street merchants had being evicted early in the morning. Children were not playing, choosing the safety of their homes. Not even a single animal was in sight. The citizens had never seen their metropolis so stripped of life before. An eerie calm had spread like a shadow.

As Segen walked, through the entrance of the hospital, she noticed Troopers located there too. They were not asking for any sorts of identification, for Naboo wasn't part of the First Order, yet. But their presence was a reminder that they were no longer free people. 

That morning she tried the best she could, at focusing solely on her job. Midala had not come to work, so her day had been quite dreadful. A painful hangover and the appearance of those people might have influenced her choice.

She checked her last patients in a hurry. Today it had been difficult to contain the dark feelings from the hospital. So there was nothing she wanted more than going to her house and sleep her problems away.

A strange scene welcomed Segen when she crossed the gate. Thousands of people were walking towards the same direction, guided by stormtroopers. She stood there for a few seconds with wide eyes. Early that day, no one seemed to want to go out, and now it was like if the entire city was outside.

She got close to a young woman with two kids at her hands.

"Excuse me, do know you what is going on?" she asked with furrowed brows.

"You don't know?" the woman said in disbelief, but Segen paid no mind to her. "The Queen will give a speech for the opening ceremony of the negotiations. Even General Hux will speak."

Such thing was odd, usually, the First Order never addressed the people of the planets they conquered. Segen thought that it was, perhaps, a cheap intent to soften the emotional impact and make false promises of peace. After all, Naboo had a powerful military force, that could change the balance if they joined the remnants of the New Republic. If it weren't for that horrific weapon, they wouldn't even be here.

_Follow_

The Force had spoken and her legs pulled her, with a life of their own. Her body was aching but still, she joined those who were going to the palace.

It was getting dark, the moons already shining over the sky. Their pathway, illuminated by lamp posts with a soft warm light. Segen studied the crowd, she found that even some Gungans were among them. Probably dragged from the depth of the swap lake, to witness the mighty "mercy" that the First Order was granting to Naboo. 

Before she could even reach the main bridge, she felt a presence. It was searching, far away but not enough. Instead of closing herself from it, she breathed in and embraced it. Screaming darkness ran over her energy, and a sharp pain shocked her. Her anger ignited, and a rage that was not hers consumed her. If she wanted to succeed, she needed to assimilate it, to feel that pain as if it were her own. As the voices had taught her, she manipulated her force signature to imitate the movements and colors of whoever was lurking. Force mirror, the voices had called it. If a person tried to track her they will only find themselves against a perfect reflection of their energy, incapable of locating her. Soon, the presence had retreated, fading back again with the colors of the place. Segen smiled, she wasn't going to make things easy for them.

The royal castle had been built near a cliff, with dense natural vegetation and astonishing waterfalls. Bridges and canals surrounded this side of the city and with countless rivers, it looked like an island. Police officers and troopers were patrolling the square where the audience was. Some were even posted on rooftops. Every security key point was covered, like if it were a war zone. 

As they moved closer to their destination, Segen thought that it might not be a good idea to remain in her work uniform. She was only one block away from the square, so she couldn't return and change.

_Ahead of you, at your right._

A man had stopped to comfort his crying daughter. He had left his bag open on the floor. She kept walking and in with a swift push of the force, she took a dark blue silk shawl. Then she tossed her white coat and grey shirt, that had the hospital name and logo, on a garbage can and with the fabric, she covered her head like a veil, hiding her hair and part of her face. With this, and her black undershirt and grey pants, she managed to be mostly unrecognizable. 

An impressive stage was at the top of the palace stairs, people were gathering close to it but she remained as far as she could. Huge holoprojectors were placed across the area for those who were too far to see. Ministers, ambassadors, and First Order officers were carefully placed. The Queen, Yané Nuruuodo, was dressed with her luxurious wardrobe, standing out at the center. Next to her, a pale man with hair like fire. He had an impeccable black uniform with a long coat. The contrast between the sides was drastic. Naboo was full of colors, patterners, and different shapes. But the others looked like if they had been pulled from a funeral, with style but depressive. But not even, with Yané her beauty or her companion imposing authority, could overshadow the man standing in the corner. _A Knight of Ren? Or is it Kylo Ren instead?_ she thought curious about his identity.

The Force surrounding him was wild and chaotic, but his calm posture did not reflected this. Dark long robes and a menacing mask. Black and red colors were pouring out of him like a geyser, shattering all light in his path. He was the perfect definition of intimidation, the rage she felt before was proof of that. Segen tried to focus her attention on the Queen's speech. But he was impossible to ignore, the Force was buzzing as if it were demanding her attention. She observed him, her mind stagnant on him. He was tall, very tall, with broad shoulders and a big physical complexion. A warrior, one of Snoke's pets. 

 _"You are here"_ she heard, his mechanical voice, in her mind. Gasping, her hands went to cover her mouth. She almost fell to the floor, when she recognized the sound, it was the same voice Segen had heard last night in her dream. _What... What is this? Is this for real?_ She asked herself. She took a few steps back, but she collided with a man. The square was so crowded that there wasn't much space to move around. 

 _"Tell me your name"_ his voice waked her from her shock. 

_Caution, guard yourself._

She felt him trying to probe in her head. Fingers crawled in her brain. _You are not dealing with an untrained child,_ she told herself and pushed him out of her mind. Denying him the answers he wanted. She felt his anger as he faced nothing more than silence and rejection.  

She needed to leave, but it would attract unwanted attention. Stormtroopers were guarding the exit points. Every one of them was too close to him. From where he was he could see who was going in and out. She needed to move from where she was, for there were not many places to where she could go.

 _"I can feel you close, but there is something wrong,"_ she detected his presence, moving among the people. 

_"Why I can't find you?"_

Thunderous applause broke the silence. Their Queen had finished speaking. Now the ginger man, who must be General Hux, was approaching the microphones. Soon this would be over, but she couldn't stay any longer. It was getting harder to hide her presence while also defending her mind. He was strong, pushing harder every time. Snoke's apprentice was trying to make her retaliate, against him, to reveal her location. But she couldn't attack his mind or otherwise, she could lose her concentration over the force mirror.

In slow movements and still facing at the stage, she retreated to the back of the crowd. 

_Stop_

Abruptly she froze.

_Up_

One of the troopers, she had seen on the rooftop, was looking at her with his sniper blaster. As his mind was weaker, it was not hard to make him ignore her. She was at a safe distance from the stage, no one from there could see her. But Segen was sure that he could sense what she had just done. 

 _"Leaving so soon?"_ she heard again in her head.

Looking for a way out, she found an exit at her right. The guards were behind a column. But at that same moment, all troopers seemed to move to her position. He still could not find her exact location but if she wanted to escape, where she was, was the best place to do that. She didn't move and pretended to be captivated by the General's words. After all, they didn't knew who they were looking for, just that they should stop at everyone that wanted to get out. Segen waited for them, as they walked by, only at three people away from her. Once they passed she kept walking to her right and got close to the police guards that were standing alone.

When she got in front of them, they put their arms and guns in her way.

“Excuse me but the ceremony hasn't finis…”

"You haven't seen me here, and you will forget my face."

Both, at the same time, answered.

"We haven't seen you here. We will forget your face."

 

*

*

 

Segen turned in her bed and looked at the stars. Her mind had been playing, in a constant loop, the events from that afternoon.

Laying there, sleep long forgotten, she contemplated the dark sky while her imagination returned to him. The whole thing was so ironic that she could, almost, laugh at it. She was regretting saying that the force looked out for her. A shared vision, with none other than a Knight of Ren, or worst, the Jedi Killer himself. Whatever the option was, he was going to be a major problem for her and perhaps even her death.

"You are trying to get rid of me, isn't it?" she spoke, like if the voices would answer her. "You had thousands of opportunities to get me killed. And, seriously, this is how you wanna do it?"

Segen had tried to give the whole situation a logical explanation. Colors could repeat among people, it had happened before. There were different shades that could be confused. So just because those colors looked like the ones she had seen in the boy she used to connect with, could just be a coincidence. A mistake surely. Besides white wasn't present and she was sure she had seen white before. Oh, but that fucking feeling in her gut was telling her otherwise. _Have I done something to make you hate me so much?_ She thought. 

Soon the peace of the night was broken by an ear-splitting blast. The glass of her windows trembled, and the floor shook. She tossed her sheets in a second and went to her window. She saw people running away and police speeders rushing to the source of the explosion. 

The view of the incident wasn't clear from her apartment. Segen needed to confirm her instincts, so she raced to the rooftop. Her heart was beating fast for what she feared it might have happened.

A cloud of black smoke rising to the sky. The flames gave an orange hue. It seemed to come from the north. _That's where the palace is!_ She concluded. _Who could have done this? It couldn't be the rebels, the knew what could happen, or perhaps they no longer cared._ While her mind was going wild, she looked at the sky and sighed in relief. There were no X-wings or TIE fighters, so it meant that there was no battle yet. And, for now, no apocalyptic red light in the sky. So she still had time to take a ship and escape. Or at least until they sent a shuttle to extract General Hux and Snoke's pet from their planet.

Segen, slammed the door as she returned to her home.

"Time to be brave, my ass," she mocked the voices. "I'm leaving the fuck out of this place."

She grabbed a backpack and started to fill it with a medical kit, emergency food, a weapon, and three different false IDs and documents. When she closed it, images of her friends passed through her brain. She stopped and sat on her bed. 

The Finalizer must be tracking their atmosphere. Any ship could be detected. Even if she could do a hyperspace jump before the TIE fighters reached her, they still will investigate. There was a chance that they could find who she was and mark her as a terrorist, believing she was a resistance member that had escaped. Hiding would be burdensome with a bounty on her head. But worst it would be, her friends getting interrogated. Segen knew their methods, and Hux was known for being quite ruthless. Would they even survive it?

"No," she shook her head. "It's my life or theirs. There is no time for sentimental hero bullshit."

The voices were becoming louder as she got closer to her door. So loud, that she tried to shut them down. She pressed her temples with her hands. A piercing pain struck her.

"Fine! I will stay, but please shut up," and as she screamed this, they stopped immediately.

Her comlink rang, she ignored it, so it rang again. She was recovering her breath.

_Answer._

She picked it up. It was an automatic repetitive message, part of the emergency system. 

_All medical staff available must report to work at once. Do not go to the palace. The rescue teams are already there._

She hung up before it started to again.

Segen was so confused at this point. Like this afternoon or during her dreams. The whispers had warned her, every time she gets close to him. They tell her to be cautious, to stop, to leave. But today she knew the Force had pulled her to him. The voices had told her to follow those people, to go and see him. Now that she could still leave, it begged her to stay. Like if that wasn't enough, she was supposed to go to the hospital and take care of the same people that had ruined her life. There were, of course, innocents among the injured. But what if she had to take care of a First Order member? And to save their life? Those were some seriously confusing signals. 

Stopping her distressful internal thoughts, she dressed once again in her spare uniform. Lives were at risk. She could have her existential crisis later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before I start writing chapter 5, I'm gonna edit chapter 2. I had just reread it and there are a few things that I don't like so I'm gonna change them. It's not going to be that much but enough to change a bit the story (it will be important later on) and the characters. So in a few days, or when I publish the next chapter, you should check that out ;)


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